The Jammy Brigade

Whenever I meet another fortunate soul who works at home, it takes about 3.2 seconds to chuckle together about the very best part of the situation -- working in our jammies. My daily work is delivered to me by DHL, and I don't think any DHL driver has ever seen me dressed (on the rare occasions he even sees me). My neighbors, I'm sure, assume that I am disabled to the point of being incapable of dressing myself, since I often toddle down the street to the mailbox at noon... still in my jammies. Actually, in the summer months, they should be grateful that I'm even wearing jammies, since my daytime attire is, shall we say, much flimsier.

I tried to provide quantitative data on the current number of home workers In the US, but, A) I don't do statistics since they intrinsically involve numbers, and B) the Department of Labor tables I did find were so minuscule I couldn't see them on the screen, let alone interpret them. I did find that in 2004 it was estimated that 20 million people worked at home, either as employees or in their own businesses, and I heard this morning on the Today show that the number is now estimated to be 40% of the work force.

That's a LOT of jammies!

If the clothing manufacturers were paying attention, we'd see a proliferation of comfy clothing designed for the work-at-home crowd -- something a tad more presentable than silk knit pajamas imprinted with little blue dogs. I suppose velour sweat pants with a matching jacket would do... but that's entirely too much like getting dressed for me.

When I was still playing the corporate executive game, I spent a LOT of money on business attire -- and I even remember budgeting 30 minutes each morning to "accessorize." Jesus! I still have all those scarves, necklaces, brooches and doodads... stuffed in a box, high in my closet. My only concession to accessories these days is to clean my glasses on alternate Tuesdays.

One of my sons recently joined the jammy brigade and rapidly discovered the blessings of working at home, although he is an employee, not an entrepreneur, and the dynamic is a bit different. He's tethered to his Blackberry, where I'm free to not answer the damn phone if I so choose. He is able to answer email while running household errands, but that wouldn't work for me since they make you turn off your cell phone in movie theaters. Yes, I sneak out to the movies as often as there's something worth viewing, (Charlie Wilson's War, for instance.)

I know that, for me, productivity is overwhelmingly greater working at home, but it also requires a bit more self-discipline than working in an office. There aren't the same distractions at home (15 people stopping by to say hi, bring you a donut or sit on your desk to bitch and gossip), but the distractions are there. For instance, my refrigerator is only 18 paces away, which is NOT a good thing. The nearest bathroom, however, is only nine feet from my desk, which saves, I'm sure, at least an hour a day in traveling time.

In the summer I get distracted by the LOUD chattering of magpies and jays in the oak tree next door, and in the winter the drama of wind and rain draws me away from my small office window to the wider vista from my living room. During last week's storm (you heard about it on national news) I counted each of the five billion oak leaves that sailed into my yard, then wondered where I could get sandbags if the rain didn't stop. (It did..)

The Internet, of course, is the biggest distraction -- but that's not limited to those working at home. In 2005, it was estimated that fooling around on the Internet cost American businesses $178 billion in lost productivity -- and certainly by now that number is even higher. That surely beats the numbers from previous decades of money lost around the water cooler.

I'll admit the Internet is my biggest downfall -- from email to blogging to stopping by a chat room, to just plain surfing. Since my income depends on meeting contractual deadlines, however, it's not the problem it may be for others... particularly employees. A business-owner friend recently installed stealth software and found one employee spending nearly six hours daily on Yahoo, and another employee playing Internet games a couple of hours each day -- or maybe I should say former employees.

Home workers do have genuine isolation to deal with, but some of us treasure that above all. Those who miss interaction manage to stay electronically connected with the outside world, and often stay more connected with their families, who are sometimes underfoot.

The lack of a daily commute is a huge all-around benefit to working at home. Maybe we who work in our jammies deserve a "green" tax credit for our smaller carbon footprints... or maybe not paying that $3.25/gallon price is reward enough. I'm down to one tank of gas a month, but then I enjoy atypical, official "hermit" status. My fuel consumption will be reduced further once spring hits, since I plan to take my granny cart and hike the two miles to the grocery store. I only hope I remember to change from my jammies to jeans.

Well, nice chatting with you. I have to start a load of laundry, empty the dishwasher, take a shower and put on fresh jammies and, oh yes, get to work.

Reality Check for The At-Home Entrepreneur

Clicking your way through Blogdom brings up a thousand and one seductive ways to "make money at home with your computer," along with a million tips on how to do this magical, wonderful thing.

The internet has been full of this kind of promise and advice for years -- ever since we discovered we could work at home and would no longer have to battle the hassle of commuting, the daily interaction with idiots and sweating our lives away for a corporation's profit.

Fourteen years ago I decided that I, too, had had enough. As a member of a corporate management team I had a load of responsibility but an equal load of perks -- it was comfortable, safe and predictable.

It was also taking me just north of crazy. One glorious day I actually lived out the daydream and resigned at the top of my voice, threw my company credit card and car keys onto my desk and walked home.

Wait... back the truck up. I did that only after I had been preparing for a new career at home for over a year. The signs had been clear for a long time that my blood pressure and sanity were on the edge, and the idea of working at home had long intrigued me.

I'd been writing since I was old enough to hold a fat crayon and had been published often in technical journals and newspapers, so that was my obvious first choice. However, It didn't take long to figure out that sure, I could make a living writing -- but it would take at least 10 years to do it, and even then my per-hour income would be about three cents when I factored in all the marketing that would be necessary. I scratched that dream reluctantly off my list.

With serious research and investigation I found a respected, profitable job that can be done at home. It took over a year of intense training (much of it while still at work... sorry, ex-boss), and since 1994 I've run a successful at-home business. My board meetings are with the backyard birds and, while still meeting contractual deadlines, I work only the hours I choose, rarely wear anything presentable during the day, and I know exactly how many steps it is to the kitchen... BUT.... I've also had to provide my own health insurance, pay self-employment taxes and quarterly estimated income taxes, and fund my own retirement.

Over the years, on professional bulletin boards and my own business website, I've posted some articles that have proven helpful to newbies. I've also encouraged questions and offered assistance to those with a similar desire and drive to work on their own in this profession.

I estimate that about 1% of the feedback and questions has been reasonable and I've been happy to help these serious people.

The other 99% have been ludicrous and pathetic, and I'm afraid this percentage may represent a large portion of those who currently think they can start a viable, profitable home business from basically nothing... no specific goal, no plan, no investment, no particular skills, no training, no business sense, no accounting knowledge, no marketing savvy, NO CLUE. Give them a computer, an internet connection and a homemade business card, and they're in business, baby!

I've received countless emails that have been very clear on what the writer expects from working at home, including very limited hours, the ability to tend toddlers while working, summer months off for their families, hugely inflated salaries with benefits, and, best of all, they want to learn a profession in a few months at almost no cost and no effort. They rarely mention the effort and time they are willing to invest.

Ask anyone with their own business what it takes to reach success and you'll always get the same answer -- a hell of a lot of hard work. The first three years of my business I worked a minimum of ten hours a day, six days a week (seven days most weeks). I've taken exactly three weeks of vacation in the last 14 years, only a very few (and valid) sick days, and my first thought whenever I'm asked to go anywhere or do anything is the possible impact it will have on my production and my contracts with clients.

I'm sure there are different conceptions of "home business" and varying degrees of what will constitute success. Addressing and stuffing envelopes is one level, working the angles for no-effort blog hits is another, taking surveys... well, you get the picture. Like anything else in life, your return is roughly equal to the effort you make.

I do know if someone plans to invest time and money into a business and expects to make over $60.000 a year, that someone better consider some of the basics and be ready to deal in hard facts, not wishful thinking. While conceptualizing a new business is exciting, creative and fun, in the actual planning stages you need research, facts, solid analyses of every facet of a potential business; this isn't the time to drift along on wishes and dreams.

• Is there a need for your service or product? How do you know? Do you have quantifiable data that shows the need, or are you assuming... do you just think and hope there is?
  
• Do you LIKE the idea of working in this field, or selling this product? You're going to be working harder here than you ever did for any previous employer -- make sure you're considering something you really want to do.
  
• If your idea is proven viable, who is your target market? Local? Internet? What kind of competition will you have? What is your value proposition? What will YOU offer that your competition does not? How will you differentiate your business from theirs?
  
• What kind of money can you make? How do you know? What is your source for knowing this? Remember that a startup company won't reach its potential in just a few months -- it can take years in some cases. Remember, too, that if you're competing in a local market, you must be competitive enough to garner business, but profit is required for you to stay afloat. Profit is not a dirty word -- it's your lifeline.
  
• What costs will be involved in your business? This is a dangerous category to underestimate and must include both startup costs and ongoing operating costs. (Training, inventory, office, equipment, supplies, transportation, software, communication, accountant, lawyer, insurance, taxes, bonding, employee-related expenses, etc.)
• What will effective marketing consist of? How much will it cost? Can you do it or will you hire professionals? There's no such thing as a successful business without GOOD marketing.
  
• If this is a new field for you, where will you get your training? Will you be able to work without actual experience? Do you know someone in the field who is willing to act as a mentor? Will your employees need specialized training?
• Is there a national or state professional organization to support your new endeavor? Networking is invaluable, and if you're not used to the solitary life of working on your own, you will value these contacts.
  
• Do you know the basics of business accounting? If you expect to have fat deductions for next year's tax return, you need to have the basics in place from day one.
  
• Assuming you'll want to take time off occasionally, who will run your business in your absence? Clients don't care that you need a break -- they care that their work is done or product delivered and that you keep your commitment 100% of the time.
  
• What is your funding for your investment? How will you live until your business brings in money? What about slow periods? Illness? Emergencies? If you are considering outside financial investment, you'd better be ready with a business plan -- you DO know what a business plan is, right?
  
• Even if you're young and healthy, at some point you have to think about health insurance and retirement -- and Uncle Sam isn't kidding about filing those quarterly tax estimates.
  
• If you're considering a franchise, is it a reputable one with a proven record of success, or are you about to become a cover story on Dateline?
• What about your personal situation at home? You'll need space - time - and if you have young children, child care, even if only occasionally. It's called WORKING at home -- not just opening mail with big, fat checks in the envelopes, and oh yeah, that free lunch thing.... still true.
  

Are you really ready to make the commitment of time, money, effort, blood, sweat and tears that it takes to start and run a business from home? You need hard data for every one of the questions above -- and the other hundred I didn't list.

To paraphrase the old bumper sticker, the worst day working for yourself is better than the best day slaving for another.... but that's my viewpoint from the porch of a successful home business -- one that offers a real service, one that I planned and prepared for by huge effort, and one that is my first priority.